March 21, 2001

A pleasant trip to the DMV?

I normally avoid the DMV as I would the Bubonic Plague. You could say I'm DMVphobic. For example, I renew my car registration regularly at AAA. The lines are shorter, for one thing. However, one situation I couldn't avoid. My birthday and my driver's license came up for review the other day. Pacifica Rotarians are fined $5 for their birthdays. Every few years the DMV basically does the same thing.

This year I was afraid they might want to road-test me. I've been leery of road tests ever since my first one, 46 years ago. I flunked. It wasn't a big deal, but I hadn't done much practice turning around, I was nervous, and I had a hard time making a u-turn on Bosley street in Santa Rosa. Bosley was about three feet wide, with cars parked on both sides of the street. I didn't hit anything. The only damage was to my ego. The second time I passed, but I've never forgotten Bosley street.

I picked up a driver's license booklet to review. That was the first pleasant surprise. I don't know who, but someone intelligent and thoughtful must have finally taken a good look at the Driver Handbook. Almost everyone needs a driver's license. That means rocket scientists, doctors of philosophy, and members of Mensa, the high IQ club. But it also means plenty of people with average and less than average educations and abilities. Even folks who have difficulty getting through the Reader's Digest need to drive. The booklet has not been dumbed down, but it has been simplified. ("Fog: the best advice for driving in the fog is DON'T. You should consider postponing your trip until the fog clears.") The sentences are short. The words are short and simple for the most part. I couldn't find a legalism, a whereas or a wherefore in the whole thing.

I'd heard it's a good idea to make an appointment, so I tried. I got busy signals for an entire day of calling. When I called at 6 a.m. the next day I got a recording which didn't help. I finally got through to a recording which worked, later the second day. It wasn't an encouraging experience. I had decided to go to the San Mateo office to avoid Daly City. I'd heard too much about crowds and long lines in DC.

My appointment was 9:40. I got there at about 9:20, the appointment line had two people ahead of me, and things went just fine. I handed over my $15. The photo was handled expeditiously, I was given a test to answer, did the best I could, and discovered I'd given two wrong answers to questions which do not affect my ability to drive safely. The same young clerk who had started the process was between customers. I think she could have let me stand and wait for another clerk. Instead she took the initiative, checked my test form, checked me for eyesight, confirmed that I can see well enough to drive, and finally punched up my temporary receipt. No road test, no complications, no complaints. The whole process took less than thirty minutes.

My new driver's license arrived promptly the other day. It's good for another five years. I think I was handled courteously, expeditiously and professionally. I wouldn't have been surprised if I'd been treated with all the care and personal concern of an army physical, but the truth is, I was very pleased, with the exception of that ever-busy appointment phone. I never thought I'd say it, but two-and-a-half cheers for the DMV.

E-mail Paul Azevedo at thereactor@earthlink.net or visit his website, http://home.earthlink.net/~thereactor/